TheBizzare.com

Mac VS. Pc – The truth illustrated

Paris Hilton isnt a whore
(…but Google disagrees)

Zombie Garden Sculpture Keeps Those Damn Kids Off Your Lawn, Might Eat Their Brains

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Hold out your hands. Now, wish into one hand, and poop in the other. Which one filled up first? You’ll have the same amount of luck when it comes to getting your hands on these gadgets.

10. Golf Bag

As seen in – Caddyshack

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Awesome advertisement campaign for Jeep cars by Bates Y&R ad agency: “Jeep: Parking Space” Read the rest of this entry »

 The all-time hottest Disney babes:

#1: Jessica Rabbit (Who Framed Roger Rabbit) - Is there any universe where she is NOT the hottest Disney babe? She shakes, she shimmies, she sings. Con: May possibly be TOO much woman for one guy to handle…

#2: Jane (Tarzan) - Ok, I’ll admit I haven’t seen a Disney movie since Aladdin. But Jane just screams hotness. Gotta love the tie and white gloves. Prim and proper. Cons: Um, can you say waistline?

#3: Pocahontas - Umm…you know this is an *official* Disney wallpaper? Maybe not historically accurate, but never before has buckskin looked so good. Obviously John Smith had more than colonizing on his mind.

#4: Jasmine - Beautiful locks, rock-hard abs and she’s crazy rich? Cons: Maybe her nose is a little big…

#5: Cinderella - Classic beauty. She cooks, she cleans, she sews. Cons: The in-laws. I hear her mother is a b-tch.

#6: Mulan - Good skin, lustrous black hair AND the voice of Lea Salonga? I’m in heaven. Cons: If she gets mad at you, look out, I hear she’s pretty good with a sword

 #7: Belle (Beauty & The Beast) - Beautiful and humble lass. Devoted to her family. Cons: Likes her men thick and wooly.

#8: Esmeralda (The Hunchback of Notre Dame) - She’s a firecracker with a social consciences. And boy can she dance! Cons: Um…what’s up with her and the goat?

#9: Snow White - The fairest of them all. Cons: Those pesky little dwarves she’s cohabitating with.

#10: Arial (The Little Mermaid) - One word: shells. Cons: Some seriously big 80’s hair. May also be underage.

You may be cool, but you will never be dual wielding AK-47s open zipper cool.

 Words cannot describe the awesomeness of this image.

Dad, did dinosaurs really exist?
Sure they did, son. The Bible says so. They didn’t call them “dinosaurs” back then, but instead they were known as “leviathans” or “behemoths”.
But, my science teacher says dinosaurs lived millions of years ago. Is that true?
Of course not, son.
Then how old are they?
Well, let’s see. The Bible tells us [from Adam and Eve’s family tree] that the Universe is only a few thousand years old. So dinosaurs had to have lived within the past few thousand years. That’s simple logic, son.
Oh. So that means they were on Noah’s Ark?
Absolutely! The Bible says two of every animal were brought [by God] to the ark. Dinosaurs were animals. So, using your logic again son, dinosaurs had to be on the ark.
Huh. So how come scientists say they’re older than that? and died way before Jesus?
Well, son, they just make that up. Dinosaur bones don’t have labels on them to tell how old they are. In fact, there is no proof whatsoever that the world and its fossil layers are millions of years old. No scientist saw dinosaurs die-
Dad!
No I’m serious. Scientists only find the bones in the here and now, and because many of them are evolutionists, they try to fit the story of the dinosaurs into their view.
That’s sad. But I thought scientists were smart?
Sure, but they don’t know everything. So they have to make stuff up to fit their beliefs. While you and I, we have the facts, straight from the Bible.
I don’t want to be a scientist!
Ha! That’s ok, son. It’s better to be right, than smart. C’mon, wanna learn how to flip burgers like your Dad?
Yeah!